The Spoils Of War: Game Of Thrones Remains Brilliant and Fiery

The fourth episode of the seventh season aired over the weekend and it was fiery as hell.

The following article contains spoilers about the seventh season of “Game of Thrones.” Proceed at your own detriment.

The episode leak had everyone up in arms about what it would mean for HBO but as it turns out, it meant a good thing. The leaked episode ended up having the highest viewership of the season. So pop champagne everyone.

This was the shortest episode ever in Game of Thrones history but the remaining episodes will be running longer than they have – so it was a bad news/good news situation.

The episode picks up at High Garden as Jaime is still mulling over Olenna’s revelation that she killed Joffrey, which leads Bronn to ask, “You’ve just won the biggest prize in the world, what could you possibly have to be upset about? C’mon you can tell me…The queen of thorns give you one last prick in the balls before saying goodbye?”

Awww, Jaime and Bronn are becoming besties; things will be very awkward when they meet Tyrion again.

This episode made me realize something I wasn’t aware of prior to this – I like Jaime, I really do. I think Jaime has come a long way from the character we were introduced to in the pilot,  A VERY LONG WAY. One of Jaime’s character traits that I love so much is how much he loves his baby brother – Tyrion. Besides, I’m still waiting for Brienne and Jaime to happen. Also Brienne and Tormund. Honestly, I could go either way.

After being paid A LOT of money, Bronn reminds Jaime that he is still owed a castle and High Garden would do very well. Jaime points out that High Garden is an illogical choice because it would be easy for Daenerys to take it back and besides a castle that big would mean a lot of money spent on the upkeep; “The more you own, the more its weighs you down” – basically Game of Thrones version of ‘Mo Money, Mo Problems’.

In this episode, we get a better glimpse into the dick that is Randall Tarly when he wants to flog the men to motivate them to move faster – he actually presents it like it is a perfectly logical decision; I’m starting to like him a lot less…but on the flip side, I’m starting to like Rickon Dickon a lot more. He’s likeable…and hot. He’ll probably die soon.

Meanwhile, Cersei is in King’s landing impressing the hell out of Tycho Nestoris, the Iron Bank’s rep, who assures Cersei of the Iron Bank’s support, “As soon as the gold arrives.”The gold which has just been looted from Highgarden.

Over at Winterfell, Littlefinger is not as clever as thinks; he tries to work his charms on Bran but Bran is not having it. There is no denying that Petyr Baelish loved Catelyn Stark…that much is true, but at the end of it all, Littlefinger is a selfish bastard that only looks out for himself.

Littlefinger: I imagine you’ve seen things most men wouldn’t believe; to go through all of that and make you way home again only to find such…chaos in the world, I can only imagine –

Bran: Chaos is a ladder

This creeps Petyr Baelish TF out because if you would recall in season 3 episode 6, he said those exact words to Varys,

“Chaos isn’t a pit. Chaos is a ladder. Many who try to climb it fail and never get to try again. The fall breaks them. And some, are given a chance to climb. They refuse, they cling to the realm or the gods or love. Illusions. Only the ladder is real. The climb is all there is.”

So basically, this was Bran’s way of saying ‘I see everything and I know what you did’. Baelish’s clever ways no longer seem enough to protect him, call it a gut feeling but I don’t think he is long for this world, especially with Arya around.

Remember when Arya was a cup bearer for Tywin Lannister and Littlefinger went to Casterly Rock to discuss battle strategies? Well, Arya remembers too…and she doesn’t trust Littlefinger.

But I digress…let’s get back to the fact that Bran is still a creepy SOB. I can’t even begin to explain it, his conversation with Meera was literally heartbreaking… for her, Bran didn’t give a shit.

Bran: You’re leaving?

Meera: I don’t want to leave you but when they come I need to be with my family. You’re safe, safe as anyone can be now, you don’t need me anymore.

Bran: No, I don’t.

Meera: That’s all you’ve got to say.

Bran: Thank you.

Meera: Thank you?

Bran: For helping me.

Meera: My brother died for you. Hodor and summer died for you. I almost died for you. Bran?

Bran: I’m not Bran…not anymore.

I’m definitely trying to be as understanding as I can because he’s obviously not Bran anymore, he’s the three eyed raven now. But common!!! The former three eyed raven had more compassion than this. Granted, Bran wasn’t ready to become the three eyed raven, it wasn’t time, so he wasn’t eased into it and taught how to handle his emotions correctly…but it’s still horseshit! For lack of a better word, my vocabulary fails me here.

I can’t even deal, so let’s move on to something more uplifting – Arya is back to Winterfell!

At first, the guards try to stop her from entering Winterfell and it was a pleasant call back to the first season when she is almost turned away at the tower of the hand.

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Her reunion with Sansa in front of Ned Stark’s statue was quite pleasant, she even told Sansa about her list. Shortly after is Arya’s reunion with Bran and this time, he hugs Arya back!! What do you know?

The Starks are returning to Winterfell, so there’s at least some good news in all of this.

Bran gives Arya the dagger Littlefinger gave him earlier, it is valerian steel. Who knows, Arya may use the dagger to kill Littlefinger.  I would like that very much.

Meanwhile, over at Dragonstone, Missandei is worried about Greyworm and hints at what went down between them before he left. I like this scene because while there is a war coming and Dany is the queen and all, she is still capable of being a friend. It humanizes her.

This episode revealed something to me that I didn’t realize was possible – there are Dany-haters. Like that is a real thing. People hate Daenerys. I have to say, I’m shocked. Granted, her asking Jon to bend the knee every few seconds is tiring but really people?  What else is she supposed to do, she is trying to establish herself as Queen of Westeros – that’s how it happens.

Jon shows Dany the mountain of dragonglass in the cave underneath dragonstone; and in this cave, he shows her the drawing of the Children of the forest, chronicling their battles, alongside the first men, against the whitewalkers. Dany promises to fight with Jon Snow against the Wights…but you know, if he bends the knee ???.

Jon has a bit of Mance moment here when Dany repeated the exact words he said to Mance when Mance refused to bend the knee to Stannis Baratheon.

Dany finds out they took Casterly Rock, but it is not the good news she wanted it to be. She realizes in that moment that they grossly underestimated the Lannisters, and their clever strategy is failing on all fronts – its time to try something else. Enough with the clever plans!

Ahhh, next comes the brilliant scene between Brienne and Arya. The training scene where Arya shows her fighting skills was one of the most talked about scenes in this episode…I can’t put it into words so its best you see it for yourself.

Meanwhile back at DragonStone, Theon returns…that slimy coward. But at least he is coming to ask for soldiers to help save Yara. A sliver of redeemability. But you know what was awkward? HIs reunion with Jon, who makes it perfectly clear that only reason he isn’t killing Theon is because he helped Sansa. Unfortunately for Theon, the Queen has left the building.

Where did she go, you ask? Trust me….you already know.

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Dany has taken the Dothraki and one of her dragons to respond to the Lannister attack and let me just it this way – Jaime was not ready…no one was.

We see for ourselves why Robert Baratheon said “Only a fool would meet the Dothraki in an open field.”

They love fighting and they’re good at it, it shows.

But that is nothing compared to the destruction Drogon, ridden by Daenerys, releases. Safe to say, Game Of Thrones WENT BIG for this one. The whole time, I found myself worrying a lot about Bronn that I did not worry about Jaime. I should have been worried about both but I was so sure this is not the episode Jaime dies in that I almost lost my head when he went after Dany when she had her back turned tending to an injured Drogon. Except for the expert save by Bronn(?), Jamie would be Dragon toast by now.

Speaking of Bronn, he went head to head with a Dothraki (sort of…he was actually pursued) but he survived that, sadly he lost his gold in the chase. And then he almost takes down Drogon with Qyburn’s weapon (this is where I thought he was going to die) and somehow he survives.

My heart bled for Tyrion a little as he looked on sadly at Jaime who looked sadly at the burning Lannister soldiers – Daenerys really brought hell to earth for these men, burning everything in her path. This was where Jaime did the dumbest thing ever, he thought he would be able to kill Dany.

I literally screamed in my room as I watched him charge at her, knowing very well that he wasnt going to be successful. Even Tyrion was panicked when he saw the only person left alive that he still loves do something extremely careless and reckless.

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The episode ended in a sort of cliffhanger with Jamie’s fate unknown after Bronn pushed him out the way of Drogon’s fire and we see him sink to an uncertain fate. Kinda uncertain, because if Jaime were to die, the show would be definitive about it. They will kill him off in a deserving manner.. so this was not really a cliffhanger, we know he is not dead.

What I want to know is, what happens next?! Episode 5 cannot come soon enough. You can catch the trailer for the fifth episode here:

Are you excited?

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